What is certain though, is that the end of summer means its time for Summer 2014 Popcorn Awards!
Before you read though know this, we here at Ninja 55 don't give a flying rats buttocks what movies made the most money or what the horrid averaging sites like Spoiled Potatoes (or whatever its called) have to say about flicks. We march to our own damn beat here, whether anybody else can hear it or not frankly doesn't matter! 555 (ha ha ha)
So, without further adieu, here is this years Summer Movie Popcorn Awards!
Phantom Menace Award
for Biggest Disappointment: Transformers: Age of Extinction
How many times are we going to drink the Michael Bay Kool-Aid? Everything seemed in place for this to be the Transformers movie we have all been waiting for. Dark of the Moon wasn't near as bad as Revenge of the Fallen, Shia Ladousche was out and Mark Walberg was in, Optimus got a bit of a makeover, and they had Dinobots. FREAKIN' DINOBOTS! How could this go wrong? 3 hours and 47 minutes later we knew exactly how it could go wrong.
Honorable mention: Hercules
Sleep Away Camp Award
for Biggest Surprise: Edge of Tomorrow
Man, did WB ever f*** up with this one, the marketing for this movie was dismal. Why would anybody want to see it from what was shown in those horrible trailers? For those that did make it to the theater, they were in for a bit of a shock, the movie was exceptional! Only one other movie kept this one from being our selection as Best Movie.
Honorable mention: TMNT
Darth Vader Award
for Best Villain: Koba (Dawn of the Planet of the Apes)
I can not say enough about the motion capture work, both from the effects team and the actors, in this film. As much as I love Andy Serkis and the Ceasar character though, it was Koba who stole the show. The Koba playing stupid ape to lure his enemies into a false sense of security scene was brilliant. He was, by far, the best villain in a blockbuster movie this summer.
Darth Vader would be proud.
Honorable mention: Ronan the Accuser (Guardians of the Galaxy) and Shredder (TMNT)
Dirty Harry Award
for Best Anti-Hero: Godzilla
Came in as a monster, saved the city from the Mutos, swam away the hero… but he did kinda destroy half the city in the process.
Oh no, there goes Tokyo… GO GO GODZILLA!
Honorable mention: Raphael (TMNT)
Ripley Award
for Best Female Hero: Gamora (Guardians of the Galaxy)
Not only is she hot (for a green chick) but she is smart, tough, and she can definitely throw down with the best of them. I also like that she has a dark and painful past. I mean c’mon, her father wants to rule the universe for crying out loud! Talk about having daddy issues.
Honorable mention: Lucy (Lucy) and Rita aka Full Metal Bitch (Edge of Tomorrow)
Batman Award
for Best Male Hero: Wolverine (X-Men: Days of Future Past)
Not because he stopped Trask and his sentinels, but because in the process he reset the entire X-Universe and wiped X3 out of existence. HELLZ YEAH! Go Wolvie! AND because he is the GD Wolverine! What? He is, and there is really very little other reasoning needed! 555 (ha ha ha)
Honorable mention: Rocket and Groot (Guardians of the Galaxy,) Raphael (TMNT,) Cage (Edge of Tomorrow)
Bruce Lee Award
for Best Fight: Godzilla vs Mama Muto (Godzilla)
Who didn't get chills when Godzilla lit up and got ready to blow his atomic breath down that Muto's throat? If you didn't, see a doctor, you just might be dead! 555 (ha ha ha)
There really is nothing more that needs to be added to that. That was one of the best moments of any summer blockbuster this year and easily scores the best fight for Gojira.
Honorable mention: Optimus Prime with a big sword on a huge mechanical dinosaur taking out the bad guys.
Die Hard Award
for Best Action Sequence: Quicksilver Time Stop (X-Men: Days of Future Past)
Admit it; we all were teasing the Quicksilver character going into this movie. He looked like some goofy silver-haired 70's punk. We are not laughing anymore though are we? That scene was one of the most jaw dropping action sequences I have seen in a while. So good that by the end of the movie, my biggest complaint was: it needed more Quicksilver! I can’t wait to see him again in X-Men: Apocalypse, and good luck to Joss Wheddon in trying to top that.
Honorable mention: Snow slide (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles) and Auto-Repeat (Edge of Tomorrow)
Godfather Award
for Best Movie: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
No other summer blockbuster this year had a better mix of action and drama without going into campy humor. Amazing motion capture effects, excellent script and direction, and top notch action sequences. This is the movie I am most looking forward to seeing again when it is released on Blu-Ray. Easiest choice on this list and without a doubt the best movie of the summer.
Honorable mention: Guardians of the Galaxy and Edge of Tomorrow
So there you have it, the Ninja 55 Popcorn awards for the summer of 2014.
Now its time for a bunch of movies trying to score awards from the far less prestigious Academy of Motion Pictures to hit theaters.
Look for our Fall movie preview to be out within a couple days.
- Ninja 55
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